today's another long day at sch,
naturally lots of things happened,
or rather, i have lots to comment on the stuff tt happened, as usual.

the more major thing would be for PW.
erm, it's actually quite unexpected tt the Year 6s to get this result.
i mean, they are a batch of very dedicated students,
always up to task, in fact, more capable than we are (or so i see it)

in fact the release of their results have been a shock to the school,
and a shock to us Year 5s too, i must say.
with the main reason being:
the Year 6s have as then pioneer batch of the DHP prog,
have always served a good role model and the ppl we Year 5s look up to.
they are like, better than us in every way, cos they are the batch specially selected for the DHP prog whereas we are on a opt-out scheme.

as we rank ourselves lower than them,
their results seemed a little unsatisfactory.
does tt mean that the scores we'll achieve would be much worse?
i shutter to think of that thought.

as our PW grpings recently got release,
some kiasu grps from other classes have alr started working on it.
(yeah i saw them discussing the other day. totally shocked me.)
well, to me, it's not about the head start, but the continual commitment.
and i resolve to take the Year 6s results as a spur to motivate myself, as well as my grp, to do a good job!

okok another random thing. (it's somehow related to the MBTI actually)
i received comments tt i'm fierce :(

as an ENFJ, i shld be open to receiving criticism and readily accept comments..
yeah. i agree tt it's true sometimes lah,
thus i shall try to reflect abt my actions:

i do agree tt i'm fierce SOMETIMES bah.
at moments when i'm not feeling too good.
i tend to express my temper in a more aggressive way.

but usually i get angry becos of a lot of things accumulating tgt.
like at times when stuff pile up and totally stress me up.
one events happens aft another leading to a built up of a high stress level and tensions,
jus like how a volcano, experiences the magma built up,
then comes a point where i could hold it no longer,
and tt's when the even the slightest thing pisses me off.
i tend to release all my angry at once, like how a volcano erupts.

yeah. so i appear to be angry at the most minimal thing.
but actually i'm usually stressed up by the previous tensions and jus happen to release all the built-up anger on the poor person or particular incident.
[ i must admit tt's kind of bad too.
poor chinghsien. she must hav gotten the worse out of my eruptions during the thinkquest period]

but trust me, i'm trying to make my eruptions less frequent now.
afterall, i'm a introvert expressing the characteristic of an extrovert right?
it's only natural to covert all my internal emo-ness into an fierce outward expression.

come to think about it,
pure introverts are kind of scary cos they bottle their feelings up all the time.
u'll never know what's on their minds.
and extreme extroverts make me feel intimidated in their presence - shows tt i'm an introvert at heart aft all.

okok back to the fierce issue.
it's ok to be fierce at times i think,
at points where you have to get your point across and no one's listening.
not to show ppl who's boss, but to make sure u do not allow others to climb over your head or take adv of you by being an overly nice person.
esp for a short and childish-looking (comment by someone else..) person like me,
it's impt to show some power to avoid being bullied i believe.

but it's bad if i appear too fierce though.
it'll create tt distance that'll prevent ppl from getting close or even try to communicate.
what if in the end no one want dares to talk to me?
[ like how i found out why there wasnt anything much for me to do for thinkquest.. ]
and even ppl i'm close to are keeping their distance - graceL?
i can feel it. :(

i mean, hey ppl, dont do tt!
i'm actually a nice and amiable person at heart.
it's jus tt i get angry when i'm stressed up.
i'll try to ensure tt it wont happen often.
and i jus want you guys to know tt even when tt happens,
it's the thing/situation i'm angry at, never the person.
furthermore, i'm more often angry with myself more than anything else,
so it's definitely not your fault and should stay away from me permanently.

another problem is tt i tend to vent my anger on ppl i'm closer to.
cos i kindof know that they wont hate me to the core jus becos i screamed at them?
perhaps, but i'm trying to change tt too.
so, sorry ppl! i love you guys and i hope you know it.

oh erm. and when u sort of see tt i'm emo-ing,
[ yeah when i emo it's pretty obvious if you're observant enought ]
jus leave me alone and give me time to myself alright?
sometimes i jus need time and space to sort out my own thinking
and i'll be alright aft tt.


and yeah i'm someone who takes comments seriously.
so please dont crack some stupid joke abt me and expect me to laugh. (ok lah, except the part abt being short cos i admit it)
otherwise, i'll remb u for sure i can bet.
haha. jkjk. i welcome positive criticisms!

and as a reflective person and an ENFJ,
i'm open to comments you're welcomed to jus tell me anything!
THANKS LOTS to those who did (:

- addition: someone commented tt maybe it's becos of guides then i kindof got conditioned to it le. possible. although some other guides are MUCH fiercer. HAHA. thanks for ur comment! (: